The Lost Art of Tinkering

(756 words, 3 minute read.)

Disclaimer: Let’s get one thing clear - I would rather do almost anything else than clean.

Disclaimer two: This is not a gender post, even though it may seem like one.

Last month, we had a hell of a storm. It was quick-moving and left two inches of heavy wet hail on the ground, three hours without power, and close to twenty-four hours without internet or TV (satellite). In the modern day, the loss of power or internet usually leads to work stopping, but for me, most of my work is still in analog, so I shifted and continued to work.

I tell you that story because it aligns well with a book I have recently discovered, Barbara Sher’s “Refuse to Choose,” which I thoroughly enjoyed reading/listening to. One of the key takeaways from the book was the concept of tinkering. The word conjures up an image of an old man in a shed “messing around” for hours. Actually, I could envision most men in the garage, a garden shed, or under a car tinkering.

But do I tinker? The simple answer is no. But why?

Sadly, my answer centered around things that need to be accomplished. The list of tasks seems so monumental and continuous, like cleaning. There is always more cleaning to be done, and I feel defeated if I don’t complete it…all at once. I know I need to change my thinking about the chore, or hire someone to do it for me. However, until that happens, it remains a problem.

Cambridge Dictionary – Tinker: To make small changes to something, especially in the attempt to repair or improve it.

www.amazeum.org – Tinkering is one innovative, hands-on approach to learning that focuses on open-ended explorations with materials, tools, and ideas.

If you read the two definitions of tinkering above, it is clear that applying the basic principle doesn’t really apply to things like cleaning.

But could it?

Maybe tinkering isn’t about fixing things; it isn’t the goal. It isn’t the purpose of the activity. Maybe occupying your time with a mind/hand connection is the purpose. Perhaps it is a way to quiet the mind. It could be almost meditative. And…from what I have seen, it isn’t about finishing the task, meeting a goal, or achieving a result. The memory of my father lying in the driveway under a car late into the evening comes to mind. Unfortunately, the car had to be in working order by the end of his tinkering.

But why can’t I embrace tinkering? Perhaps the problem is that I associate the word ‘tinkering’ with half-assedness.

I have the “if you are going to do it, it must be done correctly” mindset. That hurdle then leads me not to start the process at all. And the funny thing is, when I do break down and start setting a time or task goal, I find the damn thing doesn’t take that long to begin with, which frustrates me! I don’t like things left incomplete, and the “tools” of the trade hanging around until the tasks get my attention again. On the other hand, men don’t seem to have the same hang-ups.

Grhhhh, this isn’t a gender post!

Case in point, I don’t always have a problem leaving a project incomplete. Here are several examples: writing a book, solving puzzles, sewing, reading, and gardening. These activities inherently have long processes that I know won’t be completed in one sitting, and I am content with knowing this.

So, why, I ask again. I turned to Google and searched: ‘Do men tinker more than women?’

Oh boy, did I open a can of worms on that Google search. But the simple answer is….maybe. But it isn’t because women don’t have the capacity for it; they just don’t have the opportunity. Read these articles if you want to do a deep dive. I will leave it at that.

https://www.technologyreview.com/2016/12/12/155464/news-flash-women-like-to-tinker-too/

https://www.pacificislandtimes.com/post/explore-the-joy-of-tinkering

“Shits got to get done,” mindset keeps creeping in, and I don’t like it. It makes me feel like a martyr. Perhaps it is that I need more playtime in my life. And cleaning never seems like play.

So, how do I apply the tinkering concept to the activities in my life? I don’t know. I’m going to have to mess around with it. (Hahaha.) In the spirit of tinkering, I will keep this post open-ended and continue to contemplate and explore some solutions.

PS – The real problem is perfectionism, not making things complete and correct…which is a fancy word for fear of judgement.