Revisited - Unreal Expectations: Why Vision Boards Don’t Work

I wrote this blog seven years ago, and even though my views have softened, I still see the pros and cons of vision boards.

Saturday, January 12, 2019, marks National Vision Board Day. Vision boards have been described as a fun way to express your dreams for the future, using the Law of Attraction. Paraphrasing Jack Canfield, of Chicken Soup for the Soul books fame, a vision board is a collection of images that depict what you want in the future, including experiences, feelings, and possessions. In his five-minute video on the topic, Canfield says you should keep it neat, with no clutter, because it is distracting. I agree with him on this point, but I went on to watch other influencers’ videos, mostly from bubbly young females, and I concluded it was more a chance to admire pretty things you don’t have, spread glitter, and overuse the words ‘cute and fun’.

What surprised me was that while these young ladies were talking about the great future they wanted, they were also making negative statements about the images they used to express their goals. “Well, I like this photo because it’s my vibe, but I know I will never be able to do or look like this…” Whatever ‘this’ is. In one young lady’s video, she used negative statements nineteen times over ten minutes. I don’t think she had a clue how harmful she was being or how unlikely it was that the board would influence her goals for the year.

Vision boards don’t work, and I am going to state the case by starting with two stories from my past.

Story 1 – In 1996, I was working for a residential Landscape Architecture firm as an Office Assistant. One of my primary responsibilities was to keep the office tidy by picking up after the Architects. They would look through their vast library of books for inspiration and leave them on the table for me to shelve. This gave me a chance to look at the books, too, and dream of a day when I would have a house. Some images caught my eye, and when I had the opportunity, I would pull the books and relook at the things that touched me on a deeper level.

In some cases, I copied and kept images. I remember one house that stood out; it was a simple two-story brick colonial with a French flair. Almost all colonials are English in style, so maybe that’s why it caught my eye; it wasn’t typical. But like so many things I keep, this image was filed in a manila folder and forgotten.

Story 2 – In 1999, I worked at a job where I needed to take field measurements of an existing building (a three-family house). I was alone when I did this, and I remember it because it was a hot day. I mention this because field verification of an existing building while it is occupied is difficult enough; doing it yourself is exceptionally challenging. The temperature didn’t make it any easier. Hence, I was not in a great mood. 

I was working outside in front of the house, taking pictures and measuring, when a dog next door started barking at me. I’m a sucker for saying hello to every dog I meet, so I walked over to the fence that separated the two properties to get a closer look. As I approached, the dog stopped barking and started to greet me with high jumps, a big smile, and a wiggly butt. I didn’t know what kind of dog it was, but it was cute and fluffy. Just like that, I fell in love with this dog, and I told myself that one day I would have a dog like that. Afterward, I did some research and found out it was a Soft Coated Wheaten Terrier, and the more I read, the more I fell in love with the breed.

Fast forward five and a half years. My husband and I have moved from Boston, Massachusetts, to Richmond, Virginia, in hopes that it will help us fulfill our dreams of buying a house, having a yard, and getting a dog. And the move worked; we achieved all that we envisioned. Two months after arriving in Richmond, we adopted Scarpa, a Wheaten Mix mutt, and in May of that year, we bought and moved into a two-story brick colonial.

But wait, wasn’t this post supposed to be about vision boards not working?

DIY vision boards claim you need to portray your “Idea Life,” but we all know there’s no such thing. I didn’t make a vision board with the perfect dog and perfect house pinned to it. I had those images tucked away and only found them long after both of them had come into my life. I didn’t stare at those images every day, willing them to appear. And if I had, I might have missed out on what I ultimately received. Scarpa is a great dog! But if I had had my heart set on the illusion of a full-bred Soft Coated Wheaten Terrier, I would have overlooked the opportunity to make him mine. If I were hell-bent on that colonial with a French flair, I would have never found the house that we bought.

How much do we all miss while in the pursuit of our dreams and goals because what is presented to us doesn’t match our ‘vision’? I am afraid to say, today, chasing our dreams has reduced us to being box checkers, not life achievers. We need to keep in mind that marketing images in magazines, books, and blogs are absolutes. They are made to look perfect. They are, in fact, selling the idea of the ideal.

In Chapter eight of Brené Brown’s book “I Thought It Was Just Me (But It Isn’t),” she describes an activity she did with her women’s issues classes called “Magazine Day.” In brief, she asks her students to bring in their favorite magazines, and they pile them on the floor. Next, Brown gives the students scissors, glue, and paper and asks them to spend the next hour going through the magazines, cutting out images for their “Ideal Look” to create a collage. Then she asks them to go through the magazines again to cut out images that actually look like them. As Brown describes, after about fifteen minutes, the students get frustrated and give up. She ends “Magazine Day” by asking the class, “Where are you? You pay for this magazine. You love it. Where are you?” (I’m on the treadmill, trying to walk my ass off, literally, listening to this audiobook, and this part made me cringe. I thought to myself, stop Brené, you’re killing me!) I didn’t have to do the exercise to know I am not there; I am not in any of those magazines. 

The directions for making vision boards are set up to take out the one thing that should be in the equation: you, the person! Setting goals for the future is a highly personalized task and should start with what is going on inside, not grabbing parts and pieces off the supply shelf or cutting them out of a magazine. The whole thing can be disheartening.

Is there a better way?

I was recently introduced to Chris Brogan’s My 3 Words Process (www.chrisbrogan.com) by Thea Orozco over at www.introvertology.com. She did a podcast about not making New Year’s resolutions and instead choosing three words that capture themes for the coming year. Right off the bat, it sounded much more doable. I chose my three words, wrote them on a sticky note, and stuck it in the lower-right corner of my screen. I look at it, and I thought, yes, I can do this, I can move towards these three words. I actually took the concept a step further, but that’s my vibe, and created an envelope with each word on it. Each time I hit one of those words, I write it down on a scrap piece of paper, date it, and put it in the envelope. I intend to have evidence that I have taken action by the end of the year, even if I still haven’t accomplished the final goal. Looking back, I know I will be happy with myself at the end of the year when I can prove to myself that I took action. Here are my 2019 three words:

Speak - When I say speak, it includes writing; for me, it is the same thing. I have so many things I want to get out of my head. I have found an outlet that lets me share my thoughts with the world, which boosts me and makes me feel as if I can meet new people (networking in my new city) and contribute.

Finish - I have started many projects, both personally and professionally, and I want to finish them. I have three books and two workshops that are halfway done! And that is just on the professional side, good lord, I need to finish something!

Serendipity - Big fan of the concept. I want to balance the serendipitous events in my life with actionable steps towards my goals. This word really encompasses the first two words.

Can you see the difference? I am in all three words. Even in serendipity, I still say it will be balanced with my own actionable steps. And the most precious thing is that, even if someone else were to select the exact three words, they would end up meaning something different. Oh yeah, it took me two minutes, and there was no glitter bomb to clean up. Instead, I took the time to get to work on those words.

What three words are going to move you forward in 2019?

Seven years later and seven years old, maybe I am mellowing. Of course, the world has changed quite a bit in the last five years. Being right or wrong isn’t the point anymore. I think, whichever way you imagine your future, I only ask of you is to make it brighter in 2026. Focus on daydreaming, not worrying.

https://nationaltoday.com/national-vision-board-day/ January 10, 2026.

PS – I have no idea where those three envelopes are, but I will say the three words still apply.